Separated?

I never really considered what this move and separation looked like from the outside. In the last week, after announcing I got a job and a new apartment, I've had SIX people ask me if Joe & I are separated or getting a divorce. Of course we all know the answer is no. But I guess to the outside public, it's not so obvious. I talk about my move more on Twitter and less on Facebook. Maybe that is the confusion. Most of my Twitter friends know that Joe will be joining me in just a few DAYS (like 19ish!) but perhaps that's not so apparent on Facebook. Someone commented that they were noticing that Joe was still posting stuff from Colorado Springs when I had been home for months now. Well, besides being a little stalkerish, LOL, I guess that is a true statement.

But rest assure everyone, Joe & I are fine. We are starting a new chapter of our life and so excited to be moving on from the Army to bigger and better things. Joe got his ETS orders yesterday. And his leave packet has been submitted. Fingers are crossed that he will be home for Christmas. Now we're just worried about household goods and scheduling a time for them to come pick up the stuff in Colorado Springs. I know December is a busy time for them, so we're just hoping they have some time to pack us up.

On the move again!

I moved again today. I seem to be doing this a lot lately. My parents and I packed up my car with the stuff I will need for a week and a new job (yay). Then Rigel and I loaded in and drove to Fayetteville (Arkansas, that is, there IS life outside of Ft. Bragg).

And I start a new job tomorrow! I will be working in the fund development department of the state Girl Scout council. I was a Girl Scout of 11 years (yep, 11 years!) so I am excited to see behind the scenes about how they do all this great work for the girls.

And I get my new apartment on 1 December. Just in time for household goods to arrive and Joe to start terminal leave. We still don't know if he will be home for Christmas or not, but I am trying to stay positive about the whole thing.

I am VERY excited to be living in Fayetteville again though. I spend my college years here and it's always felt like home. I have already reconnected with some friends (people who where more eager to see me again than people in my hometown who I've known for over 2 decades, but I digress). And driving through town brings back to many wonderful memories. I drove by the apartments where Joe proposed to me.

It seems like I've been gone forever, when in reality, it's only been 5 years. But an "Army year" just seems longer, doesnt it? I've moved twice, got my Masters, and sent my husband to a war zone in those 5 years. Yeah, seems longer to me.

My Memories Suite Review & Giveaway

Hi everyone! I am beyond excited to announce this giveaway to you all! I have wanted to get back into scrapbooking for a few months now, but with all the school/thesis work and the tiny apartment I used to live in (and the mess of moving I am in right now), scrapbooking with all the paper, glue, and printed photos isnt really an option. And oh, yeah, I'm between jobs, so no extra money to buy all the fun accessories to make a page so much fun. So can you imagine how THRILLED I was when MyMemories.com contacted me to do a review and giveaway of their digital scrapbooking software??

 

 

From the website: MyMemories Suite will help you create your beautiful pages from scratch or build an entire album using one of the many professionally-designed scrapbook templates provided within the scrapbook software. A large collection of papers and embellishments are also included and available at your fingertips to help you make each page uniquely your own.

 

With over 1,500 papers, over 1,000 page elements, and over 30 album templates (including 10 new for v3), MyMemories Suite lets you hit the ground running with your very own scrapbook or photo album in a matter of minutes. It’s easy-to-use and affordable—and compatible with both Windows and Mac computers. Don’t put off your important memories any longer, add MyMemories Suite to your shopping cart now.

 

The software starts off with options and just keeps them coming! Do you want to use a beautiful designer template? Or create on of your very own??

I did a few of both. Here are some screen shots of my creations!





How cute is this layout for moving?!?!? I started searching through the templates looking for something completely different, but this one just popped out at me! Boxes! All the BOXES!! All milspouses can relate to the house of boxes during a PCS.

Can I confess something? I STILL havent scrapbooked my last Christmas in Kansas... and that was 2009! But here ya go! In just a matter of minutes, I was able to find a layout I loved and make a few pages. And its great that all of the pics are all ready to go. No sizing and printing. You can do all the resizing and cropping when you decide where you want it.

The BEST part of the software in my opinion?? The UNDO button. With all the different options with this software, you will find yourself using it too. You can change background colors until you are happy. You can add text, then revise it, and move it.

http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/b315595/" rel="nofollow">a Rafflecopter giveaway

My BIG boy!

 

Rigel turned 6 yesterday! It makes me sad that I was so busy yesterday so I didnt get to spend most of the day with him. But when I was home, we played outside because I know it's his favorite thing to do.

 

I cant believe I've had him for so long. Someone told me just the other day that we were like a packaged deal, if you want Sara you get Rigel too. He is my constant. I didnt know we would have this life when I got him. I was a senior in college. Joe hadnt even proposed yet. But I am so thankfully that he came to live with me. With all the PCSs and the deployments and training, it's nice to have that one thing that is alway there. Rigel is my constant. I still get excited to come home and see him.

Must App Monday - Voxer

 

Strangely enough, I was forced to get on Voxer by my family when I was still out in Colorado. I have to share this very cool app with you all. It's basically like a walkie-talkie on your phone. You can send text messages through it too. But you can send voice messages through it!! I can send a group message to my mom and my little brother then they can listen to the message when they have time, and send me a voice message back. It's very cool for busy people (or people who hate to talk on the phone, like my husband). And is fun when texts become impersonal. Wouldn't it be cool to send a "Happy Birthday" voice message to someone instead of a text? And what about sending a quick message when you don't have your hands free to type a lengthy text? Simply tap a button " I'm headed out the door to meet you now. Can you please order me a hot tea when you get to the restaurant, I'll be right there!" I wish more people had the Voxer app, I would use it ALL the time!!

 

Come find me if you want to try it out! You can search for people with their first and last name.

 

Run like the wind!

I have to tell you about Rigel's great escape yesterday! We were out on my parents' farm to do some work and my mom decided that the sheep needed to be moved to a different pasture. So I put Rigel in the house with the guys working on the house and went to help my mom with the sheep. After about 15 minutes outside, in the middle of the farm animals, I could feel a .... disturbance in the force. The chickens and ducks started going crazy! So I looked around for an animal or a hawk or some other threat to the animals, only to see my 7lb yorkie running along the fence trying to get to me. One of the guard donkeys isn't sure he's a dog, but the chickens and ducks are sure of it! So I yelled his name so he knew exactly where I was. He ran to me as I made my way to the gate. He was panting so hard as the chickens and ducks went nuts around us. He smelled like dog and wind. His heart was pounding as I held him close. He had found his way out of the house.

Rigel is not a farm dog. Not even close. I worry about him so much when we're on the farm. There are so many dangers to a 7lb yorkie even though there isn't another car in sight - hawks, snakes, big (read:HUGE) bugs, bobcats (!!!), animals that would kick at him, other stray dogs NOT on a leash or in a pin (stray dogs are ALL OVER this county). And I doubt he knows about any of the dangers because he is a city dog. He's been raised on a leash, unfortunately. I'm so scared that he will take off after a bird and be lost forever. So even on the farm, all the acres and acres of nothingness, Rigel is on a leash. My father says I should trust my dog more, but I love him more than I trust him. And I know he loves to chase birds. He's off his leash at the farm occasionally, but definitely not around the animals, and we're all outside to yell and chase after him if we need to.

I would be devastated if something happened to Rigel. But I just had to laugh at him, panting like crazy, as I imagined his great escape to find me. He's a brave little man. But I'm afraid that will also be his demise!

Must App Monday!! - Viggle

Have you heard about Viggle yet?? If not, be prepared for amazingness!! I've used Viggle for about 6 months now. Viggle "listens" to your TV and then gives you points for watching shows. Too easy, right? Then you can redeem those points for actual things, like gift cards. There are lots of rewards - Starbucks, Barns & Noble (my two faves), Fandango, Groupon, Chili's, 1-800-Flowers, Redbox, and even a reward of an iPod Touch!! The points vary for each one. I must admit, the points for each reward are going up since so many people are discovering Viggle. But hey, free stuff - I'm not going to argue! I've earned about $60 in Starbucks giftcards and about $20 in Barns & Noble gift cards.

 

 

 

 

Home again & an update

I've been in Arkansas for a little over 2 weeks now. A lot of things are the same as they were when I was a kid. My parents live in the same house, with mostly the same neighbors. But I wave and it takes them a moment to realize who is outside walking the little dog. My small town hasn't changed much. The roads seem smaller. There are new restaurants. Some old buildings have been torn down or businesses are left vacant. I can go to the grocery store and not recognize a soul. While the town hasn't changed much, the perspective through these eyes seem to have changed greatly. I assumed I would make the change back home easily. I've lived here since I was 8. I learned to drive on these small roads. I slept over at my neighbor's houses. I used to know everyone. But I left for college over 10 years ago. Then married and moved to Kansas and Colorado. I haven't "lived" here since I was 17 years old. It's very weird coming back now. It's like my little down has been tweaked slightly. There's something very "Twilight Zone" about it.

The job hunt is still on, for those of you wondering. There are some awesome job postings in NWA. I am do excited to find a job I love and start a new career!

Rigel is doing well. He seemed very needy for a while. He was clingy and soft. But we figured he was just out of sorts & missed his house & his Joe. He's much better now.

Joe will officially be home at the end of December. The Army has once again thrown us a very strange curve ball, but this time, we win! We get to make the decision that effects our lives. It's so nice, after being given orders for over 7 years.

Hope everyone out there is doing well. I'll blog again when I have news to share. :-)

And the winner is....

I was so excited to be able to host this wonderful giveaway from such an AMAZING company!! I absolutely LOVE their products!! Thank you so much to Erin Condren for supporting my request and offering this to my loyal readers.

So out of 67 entries, the winner is...

And the second entry was from...

 

 

Congrats to MEGAN!! You will get an email from me as soon as I recieve the discount code from the company.

Must App Mondays!!

This week's app is Kik!

All of a sudden three of my friends started telling me about this app. We all had Blackberrys at one point in time and would chat over the Blackberry Messenger (BBM). There are some perks to BBM & also now Kik. They aren't texts, which means they don't count against your text message numbers. While I have unlimited texts, some of my friends do not, so this is awesome for people who have smartphones but are trying to save money on texts.

 

But Kik is even better than BBM because it is not limited to Blackberrys! This app can be used across cellphone platforms. Lovely. And you also can chat with people without giving out your phone number. So watch this... my username is sara0120. Now people can message me without me posting my personal phone number online. This came in handy during my thesis data collection. When people wanted to contact me personally, I usually referred them to Kik with my username. That way they could talk to me (usually chew me out about my perceived disrespectfulness) but I didn't have to give out my number.

 

So there you have it. Go get Kik and shoot me a message!

 

Liebster Blog Award

So I must admit, I don't usually do these things. I just never have any time to give them the attention they deserve. But I am so thankful to my friends and readers! But look at this one! Not only is it beautiful, but it's GERMAN!! So you understand why I had to do this!



 

Sweetest, kindest, dearest, beloved...liebster (in German)

The Liebster Award is for up and coming bloggers who have less than 200 followers.

 


This beautiful award is from Bethany over at Canines & Cadences. So she has 11 questions I have to fill out. So here goes...








Questions:
1. Which issue (politics, religion, etc) are you most passionate about? Oh what a hard question! And it's just the first one! So anyone who knows me knows I am passionate about many many things. But since this is the Sara & Rigel blog, we'll go with the obvious one.. about dogs. Well, designer dogs to be exact. I was actually just on Pinterest, innocent Pinterest, where I saw someone talking about a corgi / lab mix. Where the dog "looks like a puppy" it's whole life. Gag me now! I HATE this whole hybrid dog movement. There are perfectly amazing dogs in rescues and shelters waiting for loving homes while there are people out there that want to create these special mutts in their backyard, in some cases causing problems with the mother dog and the puppies. Anyway, I will save you from the nitty gritty.

2. What is your S.S.B.? (Secret Single Behavior -- from Sex & The City) I have no idea what this means. LOL! I'm not a good "girl." I've seen Sex & and the City, but I'm not well versed enough in it to know what this is. Sorry.




3. What is your "deal breaker" in a relationship? Respect for my goals. And the fact that I'm not a typical "girl." I don't wear make up. I don't dress up. I'm a jeans kind of a gal. I've had "boys" break up with me because I don't wear make up. Suck it up dudes. Not into it. And my goals. It's not like I have weird goals. But they tend to conflict with some guys' idea of what a wife should do. Thankfully, Joe is totally cool with my education / career goals and is uber supportive of them all!

4. What is your radio tuned to when you're in the car by yourself? I have this awesome iPod holder thingy. I hardly ever listen to the radio.

5. What is the cheesiest pick-up line you've received? What's your favorite item at Taco Bell? Well, I would like to go buy you as many soft taco supremes you can handle.

6. If you could have any exotic animal for a pet, what would it be? PENGUIN!!

7. How long does it take you to get ready in the mornings? What is your routine? I can be ready in about an hour and be completely ready for whatever. First I have to take care of Rigel, so that's the very first thing I do. Then shower and dress. Can I mention that I HATE to blow dry my hair, ugh.

8. What was your favorite cartoon as a child? Smurfs. I could name them all! I wanted to be tiny and blue so badly!!

9. What is one hot-button issue that you wish everyone would just shut up about? Well, hot-button, so this could be rough. But I have to pick the prochoice / prolife debate.

10. If you could only watch one movie for the rest of your life, what would it be and why? Twister, hands down! This confuses Joe to no end! I know every word of this movie! And I just adore it! Even after living in Kansas and almost being in a tornado, I still love it. Why? I don't know. It's just a fave I never tire of.

11. What would your significant other say is your best quality? My hair. Which is strange right, knowing how much I hate to fix it. Joe says I have model hair. With the help of my stylist, Martha, and really wonderful hair products, I can make it really nice in just a few moments. Joe will sit and play with my hair, which I love because my mother used to do the same when I was near her.

Erin Condren $25.00 GIVEAWAY!!

Welcome readers!! I am so excited to announce this giveaway! I am a new Erin Condren follower and let me tell you, I'm hooked!! I wrote a whole review about my Life Planner already. You can find it HERE. And I ordered the orange iPhone case just a week ago. See, totally hooked! As if I needed to tell you all this, her products are amazing and top notch. You can simply search for Erin Condren on Twitter or YouTube or Pinterest and watch her customers light up with joy when they talk about her products. ErinCondren.com offers so many different products to choose from -- Life planners, iPhone cases, notebooks, stationary, invitations, address labels, too many things to even list! There is something for everyone. And who doesn't like personalized products??

That's why it's my great honor to present this giveaway to you all!!

GIVEAWAY RULES:

There are some very important things you must do so PAY ATTENTION!! :-)

Please note that you MUST leave a separate comment on THIS blog for each different step you do to get credit for it. Also duplicate entries will be deleted so play fair!

For 1 entry MANDATORY: FOLLOW this blog, leave a comment saying you are a blog follower AND leave your email address so I can contact the winner. If you don't feel comfortable leaving your email address on the blog (I know some people don't like to) you can email it to me at willow162001(at)yahoo(dot)com.

For 1 entry: go to the Erin Condren Facebook page- like it and leave a comment on their page saying that I (Sara) sent you. Then leave a comment here saying you did that. And yes, I will be checking.

For 1 entry: sign up for the Erin Condren newsletter at www.erincondren.com. Then leave a comment here saying you did. You will want the Erin Condren newsletter. She doesn't spam you, but does send good updates and info about new products.
For 1 entry:  TWEET the link about the Giveaway, including @sara0120 and @ErinCondren, then leave a comment with the URL here. Note that you can get 1 entry per day per tweet.

(Of course, if you already do any of those things, like follow this blog or LIKE Erin Condren on FB, just leave that in the comments you leave here)
As always, I will use Random.org to select the winner. The contest will run from today until Friday, September 14th at 12PM EST. The winner will be announced on Saturday, September 15th.

Fine Print: This giveaway is open to US residents 18 and older only. Once a winner is selected, ErinCondren.com will give me the $25 code and I will email the winner. Once the winner responds, I will email them the code. If the winner does not respond to my email in 48 hours, I will select another winner.

I can't wait to see who wins!! Good luck to you all!!

Please note that I was not paid or compensated in any way to host this giveaway.

Must App Mondays!

I'm going to try something new. I've never been a scheduled blogger. But I want to be. And I have so many wonderful apps I want to share with you guys. So every Monday I'm going to write about an iPhone app I have and love! Does anyone have any cool rhyming name ideas? Must App Mondays was the best I could come up with. Kinda like must-have, but less of a tongue twister.


Anyway, the app I'm going to share with you today is actually my newest app. It's called TouchRetouch. I believe it was $.99 in the app store. There is a free/lite version, but it has a watermark on the final product. I refuse to pay more than a buck for any app (with very very very few exceptions). I have quite a few fun photo apps, but this one is very cool. I didnt know this sort of editting was even possible on an iPhone!

Here's the description straight from the App Store:

So here's my before picture:

And here is my after picture!!

I spent a good bit of time fussing around with this app trying to see what I could "erase" and what I couldn't. Small things are erased flawlessly! But sometimes the erased part was very noticable. I tried to erase part of a house just to see what it would do. Needless to say, it was kinda weird. But I have so many pictures from Colorado Springs of amazing mountains - but with a street light or stop light in the shot. These small details were erased without any trouble. I can already tell this will be a go-to app for me!

There is a lovely tutorial when you first open the app. PAY ATTENTION! There's some great information there.

I hope you enjoyed this first installment of the new Must App Mondays!!

Planner Love!!

Have you heard of Erin Condren? A while back I heard about her site and her wonderful planners and stationary. I wasn't in a place where I needed a new planner. But a few months later, only a few weeks ago actually, I was trying to find something similar to the best planner I ever had, which I bought at a Borders, which doesn't exist out here anymore. So I was a bit stumped. But then I overheard a few friends talking about the Erin Condren Life Planners and remembered looking at them a while back. So I bit the bullet and got one. They are so hands on with their personalizing, you can even choose what month you want your calendar to start on!! Since I have a whole new life starting in September, I chose to start my new life planner than month too.

I am a planner person. As much as I try, I will never be able to sync everything into my phone. I know and quite frankly envy people who can keep track of their lives with electronics. But ever since college, I need to be able to see what I need to do. I need to be able to write things down in 2 seconds and mark things off just as quickly. Plus I am very anal about the way my planners / calendars are organized. I thought I would love the planners with the distinct time/hour layout. Boy was I wrong!! I love the Life Planner two page month view. But I am so happy with the weekly view.

Each day is separated into three sections, morning, day, and night. This gives most things a little wiggle room, unlike the hourly approach. This is the first real week of my planner so far. I have family coming to help me move back to Arkansas. And you know that was the very first thing I added to my new life planner. Also, there is some blank pages and lined pages at the end of the planner. At first I didnt really know what I would do with them. Until the move hit me face on. I started a list of everything I needed to bring with me to Arkansas. And then another page to keep track of the jobs I'm applying for with passwords to accounts I need to check the status of jobs on. I know that I will have that planner with me all the time, I might as well use it to the best of it's ability!!

Plus the shipping is just spot on! It came packaged so beautifully! You know someone took time and care in shipping this planner. Like I said before, ErinCondren.com is still a hands on business. I'll warn you right now that it takes a while to make and ship their products, but the end result is completely worth it. And the website does a very good job at updating you so you know where your planner is when you stalk your account daily to see if it's been printed or invoiced. :-)

And even though they dont have to, the company throws in lots of different labels and gift stickers for FREE!

From what I understand this is the 2nd year the company has been making planners (could be more than that, but I think it's only the 2nd year) and the company listened to their customers and made some alterations to this year's model. First thing I want to mention is the aluminum coil bounding. At first I was slightly annoyed by the way the ends were bent. They kept sticking in a hole on the covers and I couldn't fold the planner back on itself to write in. But once I showed Joe, he grabbed a pair of plyers and fixed it in about 60 seconds. If the coil was plastic as it was last year, I wouldn't have been able to alter it. It's perfect now. If you are having a similar problem, simply bend the ends into the coil more. A very easy fix. I was also worried that the plastic pocket in the back would be too thick. But nope, it's the perfect size. When I write on the planner, I cant even tell it's there. Plus it's handy for all of the extra stickers.

But now the hard part... figuring out what my next purchase will be since the company also sends a $10 off code with the planner. There are so many things I want! But take a look at this iPhone cover and then at the theme of my blog and tell me this isnt perfect!! It's a little pricey, so I need to wait until I have a job or at least until I know how much the APA editor will cost me, but this will  definitely be my newest iPhone cover!

And these acrylic blocks are just too cute! Can you imagine that on my (new) desk (when I get a job). Sara Sutliff, M.A.!!!! Can we say daydreaming?

If you have a few bucks to part with and you need a new awesome planner or cool stationary of any kind, I greatly recommend that you look at ErinCondren.com. If you need any more recommendations, just look on Twitter or watch some of the videos on YouTube. When was the last time someone liked a planner enough to blog / vlog about it?? 

Even crazy dreams come true...

Yesterday was brought to you in part by the song Crazy Dreams from the Smash soundtrack. After having an AWESOME final oral defense, I got in my car and popped in my iPod and what came on as if on cue.......


Hello, you longshots, you dark horse runners
Hairbrush singers, dashboard drummers
Hello, you wild magnolias just waitin’ to bloom
There's a little bit of all that inside of me and you
Thank God, even crazy dreams come true

I stood at the bottom of some walls I thought I couldn't climb
I felt like Cinderella at the ball just runnin’ out of time
So I know how it feels to be afraid
And think that it's all gonna slip away
Hold on, hold on

Here's to you free souls, you firefly chasers
Tree climbers, porch swingers, air guitar players
Here's to you fearless dancers, shakin’ walls in your bedrooms
There's a lot of wonder left inside of me and you
Thank God, even crazy dreams come true

Never let a bad day be enough
To go and talk you into givin’ up
Sometimes everybody feels like you
Oh, feels like you, just like you
Thank God, even crazy dreams come true
Thank God, even crazy dreams come... true

[ From: http://www.metrolyrics.com/crazy-dreams-lyrics-smash.html ]

Final Oral Defense!!

After emailing my chair every day for 2 weeks, I finally have a date for my final oral defense for my thesis. It's next Wednesday if anyone wants to send some good vibes my way. I'm sure I'll be freaking out on Twitter about it all next week.

So basically the final oral defense is just a big presentation with a powerpoint where I present all of the results of my study. I think I was more nervous about the preliminary oral defense, where I had to pitch my idea after 4 months of HARD work! Thankfully, everyone loved my idea and I didnt have to start all over. But this one seems easier, I'm presenting just the facts (ma'am). And that's easy. Plus I reserved a room where I've done two other smaller presentations for classes so I'm used to the equipment and the room and the board where there powerpoint will be displayed. That wasn't an accident.

After I **pass** the final oral defense, I have to send the whole thesis to an APA editor and pay her per hour to edit it for publishing. Let me tell you, if you can be certified as an APA editor, there's some good money in it!

Then I submit it all to the school and the publisher.

Then I'm a graduate!!

And yes, I fully intend on being that obnoxious person who puts MA at the end of my name EVERYWHERE!! I have freaking earned it!!

Twitter >> sara0120 MA  :)

Okay, probably not Twitter. But definitely on LinkedIn.

AND I applied to 2 jobs today. And I am SOOOOOO excited about one of them. It's just perfect. However, I dont have any experience. But surely they can look past all that and see how passionate I am about this particular topic. Have you ever read about a company and position and just **know** you would be a perfect match? Hey Sara, try not to get your hopes up too much! ;-) I woke up in a cold sweat at 3am this morning in a panic worrying that I wont get a job. So today was a good day to start applying.

Sharing a Bathroom - Day 1

So call me spoiled, in the 5 years of marriage, Joe & I have never shared a bathroom. With his early morning hours and lovely bathroom habits, we have always had 2 bathroom duplexes and apartments. But one of Joe's friends is staying with us for just 3 weeks while he is transitioning out of the Army while his family is moving to Oklahoma. So to be nice, and since they have the same early morning hours, Joe moved into my bathroom so the friend can use the one in the hallway.

And the morning of Day 1, I fell in the toilet. Joe obviously wasn't taught to put down the seat. It was dark & I didn't have my glasses on or contacts in. So I was obviously annoyed. I talked myself out of texting him at 0545 to yell at him. I decided that was a bitch move & I would just talk to him later. So when we were headed to bed yesterday, I told Joe I fell in the toilet. He started laughing so hard!! After smacking him a few times, we talked logistics. And he agreed to try to remember to put the seat down.

Well, in my house growing up, the seat was down. My mother was adamant about it. We only had one bathroom until I was about 16 years old. I didnt think of it much then, I didnt have to. My father never left the seat up, and if my brother did, he got yelled at. Joe grew up with his mother and one sister. He should know better.

Do you have any bathroom rules in your house?

I was born in 1984. I have lived through some great tragedies as a conscious adult.
I was a senior in high school during the Columbine High School massacre.
I was a freshman in college during 9/11.
I was 22 during the 2007 Virginia Tech massacre.


But this one feels different. I'm 28 now. And there are no delusions about the world. My daddy won't save me from bullets & batshit crazies. I've been through a psychology grad program. I know just how crazy people are. I know what they are capable of.

I can't watch tv without tearing up. Someone on Twitter posted the last texts someone sent her mother before she was shot in a movie theater. She told her mom to go to bed & she was excited for her visit. I just broke down. How am I supposed to bring another life into this world knowing how fucked up people are? How am I supposed to even think about starting a family?


Today has not been a good day. Please keep Aurora, Colorado in your thoughts. There are some people going through the unimaginable right now.

Trending Topics - Aurora Shooting

As we are all shaking our heads about this tragic shooting in Aurora, Colorado, I glanced at my Twitter account. The picture above are of the 4 top trending topics as of noon on July 20th.

I cannot believe Colorado is going through yet another tragedy so soon after the state rallied together to help the victims of the wildfire.

My heart goes out to everyone who is affected by this senseless act of terror.

On a personal level, I cant help but wonder what is wrong with this 24 year old man. One of the first stories I heard when I woke up was his mother saying that yes, they had the correct man in custody and that she needed to leave the state. I can tell you that a mother of an adult has very little control over someone. Unless she knew his plan, what could she do? It's hard to have someone committed against their will without a history of harm. She could be telling everyone her son had a problem, but there's very little a person can do without a crime being committed. Please don't misunderstand me, I'm not trying to defend anyone, but everyone was attacking the mother online. I can only imagine how she is dealing with this. To know your son is crazy and opened fire on innocent people, even children. I just wanted to point out that this man is an adult, and once a person turns 18, the parents have very little control over that adult. I could be wrong, but everyone needs to take a beat before they start yelling at others.

But hopefully we will learn just what is wrong with this person- mental illness, drugs, medication, cults, wanted to be famous, voices in his head - whatever his stupid reason is, I hope it comes out soon, so the public can identify that this is in fact an isolated incident and they can get at least some closure on this horrific event.



Friday, July 13, 2007

5 years ago, I married my best friend. It's been an amazing journey. I cant wait to see where we are in 5 more years. I love you Joe!



On the Verge

I find myself wondering what it's like to have kids. I was brushing my teeth last night, thinking about helping a child brush theirs and if I ever have a moment's peace to brush my teeth in silence when we have a child. LOL.
There was a pregnancy test commercial on TV during Pawn Stars last night. Joe had a noise. I know starting a family makes him nervous. The woman on the commercial made a loud happy noise. And Joe said, you're going to have to be easy on me when we do get pregnant. Well, this is something we will plan. I dont do surprises! So he'll know we're trying. But I asked him, when and how do you want to know? Do you want me to tell you I suspect it? Do you want me to tell you I'm taking a test? Or do you want me to tell you after I already know? He thought about it a minute. He smiled and told me to tell him on a Friday so he could have a drink & celebrate. LOL. I have no doubt that Joe will be a wreck. It's hard to think about starting a family now, with the HUGE transition heading our way. But I will one day soon move home. Get a great job. Joe will be in school. And one day, we will just know it's time to start a family. So then all these fears in my arrise.. what if I cant have kids? What if something is wrong with me? Joe laughs at me. VERY few people in my family have ever had any problems getting pregnant. Actually, only two women that I can think of. And they arent in my direct line of descendents. In fact, my grandmother discovered she only had one overy, after giving birth to FOUR children. LOL. But I worry. Being onling has made it very apparent that a lot of women have problems getting pregnant and staying pregnant. I have been on birth control for over a decade, and I dont know how that will effect me. We'll be in our early 30s before I have kids, and I dont know how that will effect me either. But I guess there's nothing I can do yet. I've never had an abnormal anything when it comes to my lady bits. So we'll just have to wait and see. Joe says that we will get pregnant the first month we try, LOL, as he rolls his eyes.

It's strange to think about being a mother. I'm just now really starting to find myself. I've accompleshed a few of my goals. I'm just now starting to "feel" like an adult. I joke with people that I got Rigel at 23, when everyone else was having kids, and there was NO WAY I was ready for a baby, I was barely ready for a yorkie! But now, I think we are finally getting there. I think I am almost prepared to be a great mom. It's a strange word. We wont be Sara & Joe. We will be mom & dad. Strange.

It's really strange to be an adult, on the verge of starting a family. We'll tell our kids about living in Colorado and how "dad" was in the Army once ... before you were born. How we traveled the world. And went to school. And how we met. And how we decided to have ... you. My parents' stories were always just stories, things that magically happened before I existed. But being a person before a parent, it's strange to think about my parents' stories not being stories, but actually their lives. All the moments that had to happen in just the right way for me to be... me.

Strange.

Head Games

My mind is playing tricks on me. I will be moving home soon, back to AR. Yes, home. Colorado has never felt like "home." I feel like I am in perpetual transition here. Junction City even felt more like home than Colorado Springs. But anyway, I'm still going to miss Colorado. This is by far the farthest West I have ever lived, as an adult. And it's so beautiful! I will miss my mountains so much. And my friends. And the stuff that is only found out West. But in the midst of going through the list of "sad to miss" stuff in my head, suddenly, a few "but remember how greats" jumped in there!

Remember how great it is to be near family!
Remember how great it is to live in a college town, not near an Army post.
Remember how great it is NOT to be an Army wife.
Remember how great it is to now all of the "hole in the wall" restaurants and hot spots.
Remember how great it is to be a local, not an outsider.
Remember how great it is to put down roots.

LOL, my silly head wont even let me have a few minutes of pity party for myself before I start looking on the bright side. Damn brain. For everything I will miss about Colorado, there are so many more things I am looking forward to back in Arkansas.

Transitions

I just wanted to share that I have a date for leaving Colorado. My parents are coming out in early September to hang out with us in Colorado one more time. Then we are packing me up and moving me back to Arkansas on September 9th. It's so weird to have a date planned.

By then, I will have a MA in Psychology and will be job hunting in Arkansas. It's so strange to sit here now, full of anxiousness about data collection and finishing my thesis and the final oral defense... and know that in about 80 days, all of that will be over and I will never live in Colorado ever again.

Life is a crazy thing.

Gender Roles

Since we are in this great transition, Joe & I have been talking about our future a lot lately. Usually in a fun hypothetical way.
House hunting online.
Dreaming about great jobs that make me want to get up in the morning (I am crazy about psychology, I am so excited to have a job I love).
Having kids.
What Joe wants to major in in college.
Getting another dog.
Shopping for huge grills.
Planning on buying a Jeep for Joe.

LOL, all the fun stuff. And I blurted out that I wanted to be the parent that goes to work and comes home and plays with the kids, dinner on the table, house has been vacuumed, bed is made, I can relax with my family. I want to be the "dad." LOL! And I just know this makes me sound like a bad female, a bad wife, and potentially a bad mom. Well, Joe just smiles. He has worked his butt off for the last 7 years. He would love to stay home with the kids. And that's currently the plan, kinda. Once I get a job and he's in school and we're settled in Arkansas, we want to start a family. Joe can be a student and a house husband while I would 40 hours a week. Once Joe graduates, we can reevaluate the roles. But I can always see us having non-traditional roles in our household.

I'm trying to find when or where I decided I wanted to have a more non-traditional role. I was raised by a very strong woman, with very strong female role models, but they are great moms too. So maybe I think, on some level, that Joe will be a better parent than I will be? In my last psychology class, we learned just how important a father is on a family. And how a male can very successfully be the lead parent when it comes to a parent/child relationship. And I really do believe that Joe will be an awesome father. So maybe I want to step back and let him be the dad I know he can be?

But also, at one point in my life, I seriously thought I had to chose between being a mom and being a career woman. Of course now, at 28, I know that a female can do both. But I want to work. I find passion in psychology and research. I want a job where I can be excited and passionate about my career path. I want to dedicate myself to this career. And I don't want that to diminish my role as a mother.

I know it will all work out. But we still like to talk about it.


And on a very personal level, I cannot wait to get out of this Army wife life so that I can find other women who have goals!! Yes, some Army wives, like me, have a life outside of their husband's job, but by far, most don't. And they get offended when I tell them I don't want to be a SAHM and have something important to me outside the home. Really, I get angry offensive messages about it. I don't know why my goals offend others. They can be SAHMs if they wish. Why cant I follow my dreams without the trolls coming out of the woodwork?

Graduation Gear!

Hi everyone! Just wanted to check in and share some amazing new things! First I wanted to show you this beautiful print I ordered from a shop on Etsy - Cedar House Keepsakes. Angela made this beautiful custom creation just for me! She has some wonderful ideas in her shop. I highly suggest you check her out. I will be ordering from her again for weddings and housewarming gifts. So beautiful, professional, personable, and very reasonable priced. My very large 11"x14" print was only $25!! All of the examples in her shop have hearts for the location instead of the star, but I really wanted a star instead. One quick convo later and she said she could do it for me. This is really why I love Etsy. They shop owners are so personable and willing to do what they can to make a customer happy. And trust me, I am THRILLED with my print. I want to order more right now! I might go get one for Arkansas.... quick someone stop me!!

The next thing I wanted to show you was my new class ring! So anyone who ordered a class ring in high school knows exactly how expensive they are. I have a high school ring, but not an undergrad ring, since I was too busy getting married and moving to Kansas with Joe. But as you all know, going back to school was always a goal of mine, so having a class ring was important to me too. Well, the ring the school offers is just plain UGLY. I hate to say it, but it is. I have no idea who picked it out, but it's gross. I would NEVER pay $450 on that ugly ring. So I went shopping. And the prices out in the world aren't great either. I was looking at about $300 for a traditional class ring. Then I found this one. I'm older and more modern and I think this sleek class ring was exactly what I was looking for. And you'll never guess where I found it.... Things Remembered! The place you buy monogrammed money clips and baby rattles! I ordered it about 5 weeks ago and it came in this weekend. It's well worth the wait. And cost HALF as much as the other rings I was looking at.

Graduation is just around the corner. I get very anxious if I think about it too much. Graduation. Moving home. Finding a job. Joe ETSing. Joe starting school. So many GREAT changes are heading our way. I just have to take it one day at a time or it all seems so overwhelming.

Speaking of overwhelming... have I told you about my survey yet? LOL! For my masters thesis, I am doing a survey about the public's trust of authority figures, like police officers. I need 1500 responses in 20 days. It only takes about 3 minutes to complete. I have 425 responses right now... with 15 days left. Overwhelming. So if you havent yet, please take just a few minutes out of your day to HELP ME OUT and take my survey. Here's the link: http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/F58TVY7

I would be forever grateful if you shared the link too. Thanks in advance.

Have a great Tuesday!

Class Ring!

I finally ordered my class ring for my masters! I am beyond excited about this! I got a traditional ring as my high school class ring. When I saw this one, it just seemed so adult and modern. The stone will be red, a garnet, the school color and my birthstone.

The school offers the ugliest gold signet ring with their seal on it. As much as I wanted a ring with their seal, as it's really very nice, I hated that $400 ugly gold thing. And yeah, $400!! Not happening. This one is less than half of that! It will of course say 2012 and Sara on the side with my full name on the inside. It takes a while to make it, so I wont have it until the end of May or beginning of June. But I can wait. And the seal I love? I'm getting that on my graduation annoucements. Also a made by Sara creation, with the help of Shutterfly. The school's graduation announcements are outragiously expensive and of course can't be ordered until July. So I found a picture online and Shutterfly and I made a wonderful card. I ordered a proof so I can make sure it's perfect and will order more when it arrives.

I didn't go to my undergrad commencement, I was too busy moving to Kansas with my new husband. :) And sadly, I wont be able to go to this commencement either. Once I graduate in July, I will be moving straight home to find a job. But a job and a future mean more to me than walking in some ceremony. I cannot wait to gradaute and start our new chapter. This degree means that Joe can ETS. And that is the most important thing right now.

Long Weekend

While I feel guilty about quitting my job occasionally, this weekend was not that time. Joe had a 4-day of course and I got to spend all of it with him. It's becoming a reality that I will be graduating and moving home soon so the time together now means a lot to me.

And... Joe is transferring brigades tomorrow. We should know of there is another deployment in our future soon. He keeps telling me the odds are very low, but it is the Army so I feel like I should stay on my toes.

Anyway, hope you and yours had a great Easter weekend.

Just Because

PSA- Poor Neighbors

How to be a dick when living in close proximity to others.

1. Make sure you blare your wannabe gangster rap music at all times from your open porch door.

2. Throw your cigarette butts in the yard.

3. Throw chicken bones in the yard that all the neighbors use and the dogs choke on.

4. Throw an end table out of your loving room window at 10pm on a random Tuesday. Make sure there are shards of glass in that yard that kids play in.

5. Pretend like you can't park your BMW in a single parking spot. Park so you are at least taking up two spots. I bet you could occupy 3 spots if you try really hard.

6. When your girl friend du jour brings her dog over do not put it on a leash or pick up its shit.

7. Have awesomely loud parties on a random Wednesday that last until midnight and make people call the cops about the noise. You'll show them that a cop can't stop your party lifestyle next Wednesday.

8. During one of the parties, have a drunk friend make a scene outside and smash the windshield of your BMW with a baseball bat. Make sure your car alarm is on.

9. Sit on your porch acting like the wannabe gangster you are and cat call the wives of Soldiers. Then get super defensive when said Soldier yells at you about it.

10. Blare wannabe gangster music from your car in the parking lot and scream over the music. Make sure you do this for at least an hour and a half.

And always remember-- You know people want to live next to a dick like you, so let it all out. You are awesome, everyone knows you're an awesome wannabe gangster dick. The neighbors just need to get with the times. They are the problem, not you.

Fox

Priority One

Amazingly enough, Yeah, I actually quit my job last week.

I still can't believe it.

It's something we've been debating for a while. My thesis needed to be priority one, as Joe says. And the job just wasn't helping any at all. Know that job that you used to love then slowly started to dread then eventually come to hate? That was my daily hurtle. I worked there for two years. I loved most of the people. I will miss them terribly. But there are some things more important. Like school, my masters, my thesis, my career, and our future. My masters will make it possible for Joe to ETS. My masters will make moving home possible. This is a very important step in our lives.

I love all of the support I got from my friends on Facebook and Twitter. Thank you all so much! After listening to very small minded people tell me I wasn't a wise decision, I had the support from the people who actually mattered. The boss man asked me why I was doing this, and if I had a plan. I told him about graduating and them moving home so I could be looking for a job, and hopefully finding a job, and house hunting before Joe ETSed. My supervisor kept making jokes about how young and naive I was, how hopefully and unrealistic I was about my future. I just wanted to scream. For someone who was trying to convince me to stay, she was making it really easy to walk away. It makes perfect fucking sense that I would go back home and find a job before Joe quits his, right?? We are not stupid. We're planners. We cant be unemployed and homeless when Joe ETSs. This is our plan, and I think it's a damn good one. Oh, the other option she gave me was to take a break and work on my thesis and then come back in July when I'm finished instead of going back to Arkansas. Why on Earth would I come back and work with these people after I have a MASTERS?? I hate the man I used to work under. He pulls "rank" on us all the time. I would I have a degree over him only to come back and be barked at by his dumb ass? I don't think so.

Anyway, I've been reading like crazy and writing a little too. I have a stack of articles literally about 4 inches tall I've been working my way through. I'm learning so much about my topic and hopefully coming to a good point to research.

I am so lucky to have such an amazing husband who let me quit my job. It was so unnecessarily stressful and frustrating. Going to work everyday only to come home tired and pissed just wasn't worth it anymore.

And yet... I feel so guilty. Joe still hates his job but he cant quit his. There are some amazing women on Twitter who have been looking for jobs for months without success. And here I am just quitting mine. I looked at Joe this weekend in a panic... "Am I a 'homemaker' now?" I know it sound offensive, but that is not my idea of a good title. He just smiled.... "you are a student now." Ahh... does he know me or what??